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Comment Spammers Resorting to Jokes

I thought I’d seen all the evil comment spammers can do in their comment spam, but this one takes the cake – literally.

Comment spammers have used news bits, text from books, quotes, nice words about you and your blog, and a variety of text to incorporate their links and get you to think that what they are saying is a legitimate comment when it is really evil link stuffed comment spam.

Now, they are resorting to jokes and funny quotes, and not just in English. And they’ve come up with some great ones.

Here are a few of my favorites:

I bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house.
– Steven Wright

“There’s a door.”
“Where does it go?”
“It stays where it is, I think.”
— Terry Pratchett, “Eric”

Marty, non pensi quadrimensionalmente!
– “Doc” Emmett Brown (Christopher Lloyd), “Ritorno al Futuro”

Voodoo is a very interesting religion for the whole family, even those members of it who are dead.
— Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, “Good Omens”

You don’t sew with a fork, so I see no reason to eat with knitting needles.
– Miss Piggy, on eating Chinese Food

“It’s a god-eat-god world.”
— Terry Pratchett, “Small Gods”

While funny, this is as close as these are going to get to public exposure on my blogs. caught these, so they were not released on my blog. The laugh is on you.

Okay, listen up, comment spammers. I’ve told you before and I’ll tell you again, it doesn’t matter how you try to hide your comment spams or spamming links in my comments. I will route them out and report them. You will be banned. Resistance is futile, so is creative comment spamming. Useless. Quit wasting our time and go back to whatever advertising and marketing hole you crawled out of. You give the advertising and marketing business a bad name. So go away. Now. You aren’t winning here.

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Copyright Lorelle VanFossen, member of the 9Rules Network

Member of the 9Rules Blogging Network


  1. Posted September 1, 2006 at 6:34 am | Permalink

    Have received quite a few of them lately, directly report them as spam.

  2. Posted September 1, 2006 at 3:12 am | Permalink

    The ever increasing tidal waves of spam is certainly an indicator of success on their part. Bots are getting extremely good at jumping through hoops and publishing content. I, as plenty of others, have been a victim of comment spam most of which is disgusting and I’d welcome some joke spam from time to time.

    Since I spent a bit of time researching solutions, I’ve come up with a seamless JavaScript implementation which degrades to email comments if need be on my Movable Type installation. As another layer of protection, I’m using MTKeystrokes which means to comment you have to initiate the onkeypress event.

    Guess what, not one bot has got through it yet. Only spam was a very sad individual desperate to promote his fake watch website. I’m sure there’s a WordPress version kicking around somewhere. It’s highly recommended.

  3. Posted September 1, 2006 at 3:25 pm | Permalink

    Oh, Lorelle, Lorelle.
    You’re just fabulous 😉

  4. Posted September 2, 2006 at 1:59 am | Permalink

    The increase may not be due to success, just good marketing on those selling the service/scripts.
    One advantage of not running one of the more popular blogs is that I can rely on the top bloggers like Lorelle to catch the spam before it drips down to my level. I have had only one comment spam slip through so far.

  5. Posted September 11, 2006 at 3:49 pm | Permalink

    Here’s a new one for your collection. It involves a grant proposal, sort of, and a request for money. Maybe it is a “phigging” effort, with shades of the former Nigerian minister? The content (HIV AIDS) is very serious.

    I’m pasting the content below in case you haven’t seen it yet. Otherwise it has been sent to Akismet.





  6. Posted September 11, 2006 at 4:49 pm | Permalink

    This has been going around for years, both in email spam and comment spam. It’s phishing and illegal.

  7. Posted September 11, 2006 at 8:52 pm | Permalink

    FYI–The forwarding addresses for E-mail “phishing” is:

    for E-mail spam is:

    I sent the blog comment (phigging?) to both.

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